The Art Of Grace and Age

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The Art Of Grace and Age

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“Girls just want to have fun” Do we? How about, we just want to live healthy, happy, and feel we are appreciated for who we are, and what we do.

Turning 58 this month, brought a new light on my life, as I write my Book, “Big Tears Little Hearts” I am starting to really feel the affects of aging. It truly is not much fun. Having aches in places you never knew existed, and feeling tired after doing simple tasks just does not quite seem like pleasure. Even worse, being reminded that you are aging by commercials on TV, the younger generation reminding us all the time, “Oh, you are to old” to do this or do that. What a nightmare, and yet, we are expected to age Gracefully.
What the heck is that all about?
No one ever told us, that part of the aging process would be easy however, they never told us it would be painful, annoying, depressing, and embarrassing. No wonder our memories get bad, we do not want to be reminded of how we use to be, in comparison to how we are now.
One of the funniest things about myself I notice is how everyone else looks so much younger, as I grow older. Like watching young people driving cars, I constantly make remarks about how “they can not be old enough to drive” They look like they are only ten, and yet I realize, they have to be at least 16 or older in order to legally drive. I also find myself asking people to repeat what they say a lot, because of not being able to hear as well.
I thought that did not kick in until I was at least 80. Wow…
The only bright side is menopause, and not having to deal with periods, and buying tampons anymore.
Trading those in for Night Sweats, hot flashes, and mood swings. So what is really worse?

Aging gracefully, not an easy thing to do for most of us. As men seem to get better looking with age, we just require more maintenance. Facelifts, uplifts, makeup, botox, tummy tucks, girdles, lotions, potions, and dyes. All to help our outer appearances. What helps our inner woes?
I hope in this writing, I can with that.

First and foremost, acceptance is so important. Just like any traumatic force in your life. There are those stages we all have to get through before we finally reach peace within us.

Once we accept the fact of getting older, then we start to find ways to help overcome some of its hurdles.
Part of acceptance is understanding the fact we are all going to die.
Yes, it is hard, even harder than accepting others that have.
The Circle of Life is what it is. As a life departs, a new life is taking place.
I have watched others leave us, so many I have lost count, I was in a career, where death and dying were a constant. Some find as you witness death and dying many times, it never gets easy, but it does have a tendency to “Crust” you with a protective shield. To others you may appear to be “cold” in feelings, or lack of. To others you may seem non-caring. All because of the protective Crust you have built up over many years of exposure.
Between my career in Elderly Care Living, and my own family, I have managed to develop a better understanding to acceptance and moving forward.

Honestly, it is very hard for me to deal with death, especially when it is someone I am very close too. Dealing with my own, not so much. I do however tend to worry about those I may leave behind, and then once I regain sensibility, realizing, I will never know what happens, nor be able to do anything about it.
Reality Check.
Okay, now we have accepted we are going to all die.
Now, lets work on acceptance of our lack of energy, lack of youthful appearances, and lack of interest in things that use to matter.
We have now exchanged all of the above for other things that tend to matter now, that never did back then.
Things we all take for granted, have now become issues of importance. Like, “Did you take your meds?”
Regularity seems to become important as we age, what is graceful about that?
Women, are probably the worst when it comes to being over critical when we age.
“Did you see how short or tight that skirt is?”
“So much Makeup” “She has no business wearing Spandex” “Well, I never!” and so on…well guess what, new generations have their fads just like we did, and even though we may not like them, or accept them, our parents and elders would criticize ours too. Again, The Circle and Cycles of life.
Dealing with wrinkles, and aching joints have now taken the place of worrying about fitting into our tight jeans, or having the perfect hair styles.
What we all need to remember, is feeling proud we have managed to live long enough to have these headaches.
Case in Point, you will adapt, you will survive and you will do fine if you just remember the grace of being alive. So what your hair is grey, so what your tummy pooches out more than it use too, so what your breast sag, so what you have spots and wrinkles where smooth tight skin use to be…So What!
You are still beautiful, still smart, still loving, giving, caring, and if you try hard, still shake your groove thing!
All the dyes and makeup in the world can never hide or cover who you are inside. Let that be your art of aging, and never forget we are the Smarter Sex.
More on this topic is coming, so stay tuned.

About the Author

PhilisJust a Mother, Wife, Career working individual with lots to share. Experienced in lots of things that might help others, and want others to join in our share. Published Author and Career Women, who believes in being able to speak freely and openly about any subject considered important to all. My main mission is to fight and win the battle of Cancer that takes to many lives everyday. I want to see a Cure and will continue to raise awareness and funding to see that happen. If not in my lifetime, but in the life times of my kids and grand kids.View all posts by Philis

  1. Philis Santello
    Philis Santello07-18-2012

    Not getting older, getting smarter!

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