They married, moved to Louisiana, and started their new life together. Mother had a secret though, she had been married for a brief time, prior to this marriage, but it was never really talked about, and I know very little about it. After graduating from High School, she was dating and had gotten into a serious relationship with a young man which then lead to pregnancy. During that period of time, that was not talked about nor brought out into the open, if possible. A quick civil ceremony was performed, and a baby boy was born soon after. All kept pretty hidden from the public. My Half Brother, was a great kid, and had been raised by his Father. My mother soon after he was born, left the relationship and him. She had visitation rights, and did her best to see him as much as she could, but was totally forbidden to have him live with her, which at the time, she had moved back in with my grandparents. Folks back then did not take issues like these lightly. It was considered Sinful, and unacceptable. Especially if you were raised Roman Catholic.

Thank Goodness his father was able to care for him and his parents took him in with loving arms.

Now Married to an Officer, My mother felt some of her dreams had come true. Living a pretty good life, having a Nanny to take care of me, while she scampered off to the hair dressers, and getting her nails done and having tea with other officers wives.

Story has it, and believe me I was told this so many times it became sickening, my mother and father had a tough time getting pregnant, so they sought the help of a Fertility Specialists..yes, they apparently had those even back then.

I am the product of a “Test Tube” according to my mother. Gee, doesn’t that make you feel all warm and fuzzy…

The problem with that is, she never let me forget it…..To be Continued….

Being an Officer’s wife, took a special meaning to my Mother. Making sure her home was always spotless, and her appearance impeccable. Moving around was a major part of their relationship. Dad was a pilot and went TDY a lot. Mom, always involved with some women’s group, Modeling, and entertaining. The wear on a Military Wife, and family can sometimes be overwhelming, and lonely.

There are two major roles a wife or husband depending on who is in the Service, are independent when they are gone, and dependent when they are home.
Not an easy transition for anyone, much less young spouses who have not even had a chance to learn about life in general much less being a dedicated and devoted Military Spouse.

Trying to play the role of both Mother and Father is not easy either. Kids do survive, and grow up in most cases, well adapted, and happy. I on the other hand, saw to much of the dark side, and can tell you, words can not express how I felt, or still feel.

For my mother, drinking alcohol was her salvation for escaping the loneliness, and gave her the courage to get out and be very social. Remember, she came from a very strict up bringing, no make-up was allowed, clothing had to be very conservative, and boys? What boys, no dating until she was 18.

Now, turn a woman loose, who has been confined all her life, well……………..to be continued

Part of becoming a citizen of the United States of America, joining the US Army. In time for WW1. First Home base would be Ft. Sam Houston, San Antonio, Texas. One would be stationed in PA.
The brother station at Ft. Sam, was my grandfather.

After his enlistment, he met my Grandmother. Very young and beautiful, married a year later. My grandmother helped educate and taught my grandfather proper English, he spoke broken English, enough to get him in the Army, but my grandmother was able to help him refine his vocabulary.

My Grandfather was a true patriot, he loved America, and fought for America in two World Wars.
He was Sam Houston, Jr.’s Private aide, in WW1, horse Calvary, and was awarded many medals and a Personal Letter from Harry S. Truman.

After a very long and trying time in the Service, he retired, went to work for the Sheriffs Department, then opened up an ICE House. He had made so many friends in the Army, they would if able, come by and visit often. One of his best friends while serving was Dizzy Dean, the professional Baseball player, I still have pictures of my grandfather and Dizzy, while serving and after. They were very close.
Even have one of me bouncing on his knee.

Born in the 30′s, my mother was the apple of my grandfather’s eye. Not able to spend much time with her, due to the wars, as he aged, he began to make more effort to be a part of her life.

Though struck down at an early age, of 57, my grandfather lived life well, and was loved by so many. Only 5’8″ he was powerful.

My Mother, was raised in a very strict Italian home. Roman Catholic, and went to a Private Catholic School. My grandmother, a beauty in her own right, strawberry blonde, petite and very soft spoken, loved my grandfather and my mother so much she gave up her teaching career for them.

My Mother was quite the mix of their personalities, beautiful, Auburn Hair, olive skin and the greenest eyes I have ever seen. She was a knock out. 5’6″ slender, and well built.
Very attractive, meant hard to handle..

Coming from a very strict home, she defied and argued the “Rules” a lot.

Even as a teenager, she was a rebel. Smart, and good looking, she left huge impressions on everyone she encountered. She was Crowned “Ms.Curity” Was an extra in the movie “Picnic” and had a budding Nurse career in the works. She was a Fashion Model, and when I was very young her and I use to model together, providing “Mother Daughter” fashion photos. After going through Modeling School, she always had offers and lots of work. In those days, Natural beauty was a very hot commodity. There was no air brushing, or tons of Make-up used, nor was there much plastic surgery. If you had natural beauty you could virtually write your own ticket.

On her way to success and fame, she met my father.
A young Lieutenant in the Air Force, going through some kind of training in San Antonio, from California. His initial entry into the service was the Navy, flying fighter jets, then crossed over when that was allowed into the USAF. As a viewer of a Fiesta Parade, held every year in downtown San Antonio, he spotted my mother on a float. Determined to met her, he followed the float to where it stopped, and ……to be continued..

I am grateful that so much attention is now being given on a problem that has been around for centuries. A shame it has taken so many years for it to come to light.

In my generation, there was no discussion or complaints lodge that were heard.

I created this blog, in part to be able to address my own fears and bring out truths, opinions and feelings none of us really get the chance to express. Call it a self biography, that can be my Diary or Life’s Journal.

Because I came from a Generation of being stifled and not really listened too, I feel our time has come, and now maybe as a woman, I can finally release those anxieties that have haunted me for years.

And, I hope I can help other women do the same.

Growing up, I was the victim of some very serious abuse, raised by a Mother, (God rest her soul) who had a sever alcohol problem. Sober she was the best Mother anyone could ask for, but once she started drinking, her personality turned 180 degrees. Mean was an understatement, she was down right vicious. Full of anger, she took it out on anyone in her space. Unfortunately, I was in her space a lot. She had no bias on what she struck, or what she used to strike out. Batter and bruised herself from domestic fights with her husband, my step father, I had a tendency to be her double.
So many days and nights I would go to bed hungry, my hair pulled out, bruised so bad it was hard to move, much less sleep.
Some days, I could not even go to school, to beat up and hurt.
When I did, no one ever asked or cared to find out why I had black eyes, or part of my scalp was exposed from the missing hair. If I did try to explain, all I ever got was, “Well, be a good girl, and stay away from her when she is like that.” Yeah, okay, of course…

God Knows I would try to stay away, I would hide, I would even run to the neighbors..would anyone help? NO! No one wanted to get involved, no one wanted to report it, and no one wanted her wrath either.

Schools did not report, and hospitals? What Hospitals, you weren’t taken to a hospital, you healed on your own, or you die.

Now keep in mind, this was not just an occasional problem, this was after a few years, an every day event. Every day the drinking, every day the fights started and the fun begins.

The police were out to our home so often from my mother calling them on my step father or my step father calling them on my mother, they new them both by their First Names..and we are talking a large City…

I use to say growing up, if I had a dime for every time they fought and called the police, I would have been a very rich girl…and the money wasted on divorce attorneys, broken furniture, cars, etc. all products of their violent behavior. From the age of 5, until I left at age 15, it was a total nightmare. At least I could escape to my Grandmothers once in awhile, but I would always have to go back.

Stay tuned for more………

I truly think shows like AB and Soul Train, were the start of my dream of one day being a Dancer or a Singer..as a young girl, I remember standing in-front of my mirror and using my hair brush or my tooth brush as a microphone, and singing my heart out. Had some good moves then too!
Well, I did not succeed in either as a living, but do enjoy good music and dancing. Thanks Dick for bringing all that and ringing in the New Year with us in our living rooms, in such a grand style.

RIP

Let’s start with the “Choice” comment.
I had to go to work, or I would have starved to death. Is that my Choice, or circumstances that control our destiny?

I am also a Mother, working 90% of my life, due to necessity, and in a generation where some males demanded the wives stay home, while others demand, “Do your part” to help support the family.

I have enjoyed having a career, and being a MOM, however, I do not appreciate being stereo typed that it is a choice or luxury we all have.

First and foremost, financially, never was fortunate enough to fall into loads of money, or have a silver spoon in my mouth. From the tender age of Eleven, I have worked to earn spending money and even support my own educational needs.

Or as some women, married into money…
I have always worked very hard to earn a living, and have no regrets, and have shared with my spouse the roll of supporting a living.

I can honestly say, knowing Stay at Home Moms, and raising children, I know for a fact it is a hard job, with very little appreciation, respect, or compensation. For anyone to disrespect Mothers of any situation, is down right rude, and unforgivable.

Most important, why are we even having this discussion? Again, Women getting second rated for making choices if they can, and again Men never having to explain or justify their choices or roles in the home or in careers..Why?

What is wrong with our judicial system when something as obvious as this is a major problem, visible to all and clearly an act of unlawful behavior not a cause to Alert the public and put it up on an Emergency Billboard?

Why do we wait until a tragedy, before we act?

If a person has outer beauty, that is great, however I think we all can agree, inner beauty is more important.

And, if there are those who are jealous or unkind to persons because of their outer looks, then it might be an issue they are having.

Lack of self esteem, lack of attention, what can cause those feelings? You be the judge and tell me what drives Hate, being unkind, being selfish, being spiteful, come on ladies, inquiring minds want to know!!!

We are already an open book when it comes to many services who require confidential information to unlock Pandora’s box, whether it be for credit needs or insurance, we are all scoped and probed one way or another.
I visualize the next group who will want this type of information will be Universities and Education venues. Before you can be accepted in a College or School, these demands will be made.

Time to draw a line between what is acceptable requests and what is not. We all need to write our State and Federal Reps and demand protection, our given right as American Citizens.
It is already bad enough that hackers and the powers to be can already find anything they want and expose it, so tell me, do we really have rights of privacy? Do We?

Trayvon Martin
What a tragedy.
It is tragic, and very sad to see anyone lose their life. Especially, at the hand of another.
Some things we can only try to prevent or understand. This entire situation is very questionable, and I feel now has been driven way over the initial issue. A life has been lost, another life is pending prosecution.

I think it is time to put both in prospective.
I really do not think anyone truly knows what took place, and unfortunately, Trayvon is not able to tell us his story.
The important thing to remember is keeping the facts straight and allowing the right people to find the correct answers, filling in the blanks.
Justice can prevail, if we let it.
To much verbiage and anger is over taking reason and truths.
The chatter talks about “Hoodies” and Race.
Is this really a matter of either?

My personal opinion is this, watch enough news stories about crime, and unfortunately, a lot of criminals wear Hoodies, it is a protective cover for many. On the other hand, if we continue to condition our minds by watching all the news stories every day about crimes committed, and the thugs who choose to wear these garments, it does have a tendency to affect your thinking and embeds fear in all of us.
I do not think RACE is the issue here. Just the fact of someone hanging out, wearing a hoody, and maybe acting strange or suspicious can strike a fear in some.
Not justifying anyone’s actions, just trying to place myself in their shoes.
I have found myself get nervous or scared when I am walking somewhere and someone behind me is walking looking down and wearing a hoody. Or in a store, and someone comes in wearing a hoody, and you can not help but wonder what they are up to.
I do not act on it, or find myself compulsive to injure them, or pay attention to what their color of skin is…I just become more aware of my surroundings and become cautious. I wear hoodies myself, so the clothing is not a problem, it is what the media and criminals have labeled it.

So, before I can judge right or wrong, I need the facts, and need to understand the circumstances surrounding the incident.

I am really tired of the RACE CARD being used every-time something happens to someone of color.
In the eyes of God, we are all one color inside.
We will never have peace and be free of racial issues as long as there are those who continue to stir the pot all the time…Just looking for any reason to create chaos all the time, and the media just continues to add fuel to the fire storm.

Who represents other nationalities or “colors” when they are in need or in trouble? I guess we need to creat a Quantum C for Caucasians, Quantum A for Asians, Quantum S for Spanish, etc..you get my drift?
Just Stop all this non-sense, and lets get back to reality.
A possible crime may have been committed and now it is time to do what is right and needed. Get to the truth and facts and handle it accordingly. Morn the death of a young man, and do what we can to prevent it from happening again..
Remembering, all are innocent, until PROVEN Guilty.